Instilling the word of God unto the hearts of your children is forever an ongoing process. During a conversation a few years ago about children’s spiritual growth, a church leader sarcastically said, “yeah who really does family devotions anyways.” I will admit I didn’t say “we do.” I felt embarrassed and naive that we were doing it. I should’ve spoke up, but no one usually want to listen to the wisdom of a new mom, because what do we really know. But new moms still have excitement, drive, and hopes that contrast the cynical, self-centered, lukewarm view of some empty-nesters. I didn’t need to be told to quit trying Family devotions, but encouraged to keep it up because it will be tough. I needed advice, that only an experienced mature believer can give, on how to wade through those tantrum waters ahead. But that’s not what was offered and I wonder how many other moms feel alone, helpless, exhausted, failures, and confused and all the advice they get is “you were foolish for even trying.” I’ve been blessed with a strong extended family to help guide, but not everyone has that. So after our complete utter disaster of today, I wanted to share what real life Family Bible time looks like at home, in hopes to encourage someone else. We do a couple things right now: •Family Bible Study •Family Quiet Time •Memory Verse Reading Right now, for our Family Bible Study, we have a Bible basket that holds my two Bibles, my devotional, and our children’s picture Bibles. The boys can pick which Bible to read and look at pictures quietly while I get my own reading in. Once I have my own time, I read a chapter aloud out of my Bible and a story from theirs that they have chosen. We end in prayer...at least that’s how Hallmark would show it. Today we took our Bibles on our morning walk to do our Family Bible reading. The boys reading on their own is new to them, but we’re trying to teach them the habit of daily being in the word. So far, the three year old wants nothing of it. He refused to open his Bible and complained. The baby took his short baby time, but while he was quiet, the three year old whined. Then baby was finished and crying to climb on the rock, so my own quiet window was lost. I read my devotional to the sound of complaining children and then read a chapter of Proverbs to them, while they climbed on the rock, repeatedly brushing ants off the baby and taking pebbles from his hands. Then the three year old complained he wanted a snack I fought the urge to scold a plethora of Christian guilt to try to manipulate my child to opening his Bible. It’s so hard to accept that as a parent I have no control over my child’s heart. There’s no magic words or steps to promising a little angel heart, devoted to God and obedience. But even if he was sitting pleasantly, singing hymns, and whispering little child prayers to God, it doesn’t mean a thing. He could just know how to manipulate a situation to look good and get mommy’s approval, and I could get an A+ at raising a little hypocrite. So I look for the silver lining; he’s honest with me. I’m seeing his true heart so I know how to pray. He actually did end up flipping through his Bible on the rock, while I was reading aloud, and he even asked a question about one of the proverbs so he WAS LISTENING. They’re learning it’s important. I’m learning to hold my tongue, to persevere, and that God calls me to instruct them, not to change their heart, I must leave that to Him. I don’t save. I am not the giver of knowledge and understanding. He is. So we’ll do it again tomorrow. Again, I’ll take a deep breath and ignore the attitudes and whining. I’ll try to read a bit myself and share how special our time is. This afternoon will be our family quiet time and they like that, but we’ve been doing it longer. We get out our special blankets and lay on the floor and be still, listening to God, praying, or thinking about him. I try to alternate doing it with and without baby. He needs to learn the habit of sitting still, but he doesn’t get it yet. He’s crawling all over and thinks it’s a wonderful time, so it’s a bit distracting. The thing, is he knows it’s a special time and he IS learning. We did quiet time during baby’s nap yesterday and forgot to put away the blankets. He squealed when he saw them and immediately sat down...and then stood up and sat in a new spot...and then found another new spot. He isn’t quiet, being still lasts maybe 10 seconds, but he wants to do it with us. Very rarely is anything picture perfect, and if it is it lasts just long enough to maybe snap a picture but that’s it. A picture makes a specific time last forever because it stopped that time, but time doesn’t stop and neither does a toddler. Memory verse reading is simply that, my Bible is usually on the table during meals and I read the same verses over and over. I underline the verse and mark each page with some sparkly washi tape to make it easy to find. We all end up learning the verses and little Danny enjoys the routine and repetition. Slowly more verses are added, so at this point we already sometimes don’t get through them all, but Danny knows almost all of them. Danny isn’t a performer and if he’s told to memorize or asked to recite he will dig in his heels and refuse to do anything. The pressure of messing up makes him refuse to try, so we don’t even act like it’s anything more than reading. For a time he wanted to say them with me, but now he refuses. He comments at church if he hears one he knows, and he regularly recites Joshua 1:9 to me the moment I’m showing any frustration. So, I’ll give up having a performing monkey and trust God to do the work. If I stay consistent at reading them, the boys are hearing them as well, and whether they want to memorize them or not, they are. We are just working a little slower, but I don’t know who we’d be racing anyways. These times aren’t perfect or consistent. There’s days where I’m grumpy or seasons where we’ve gotten out of the habit, but just because a habit broke doesn’t mean we can’t pick it back up. I remember in high school my pastor saying, “if you quit reading the Bible because you failed to read the whole thing in a year, so what! Keep going! Don’t you think God would rather have you read it than quit because YOU didn’t meet the timing YOU decided.” I apply the same reasoning to family quiet time. I’m to be faithful, that doesn’t mean perfect. If we’ve gotten off track, praise the Lord for his graciousness in showing me, praise Him for His patience, His mercy, His forgiveness. He knew I’d fail and never expected me not to, that’s why He sent Christ. Praise Him for providing a Savior, for His unconditional love, for His direction and discipline, and get back to where we need to be.
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Living the gospel daily.What does that mean? What does that really look like? As I sat down this morning for my quiet time, this is what the focus of the day was, The gospel, the Word of God being living and active in my life now. It should have changed everything in my life, it’s impact woven through the way I think and act. Here's an excerpt from today: ”..the gospel redefines how we understand our whole story, how we think about the meaning of life, how we understand the human struggle, where we get our identity, where we look for peace and security, what we consider in life to be dangerous, what we see as successful living...” ”..When Jesus takes up residence in us everything in life changes. Nothing remains the same. Now if you don’t know this, you celebrate your salvation, but for help with your marriage, parenting, sex, money, friendships, fear, addictions, decisions, and such, you don’t look to the gospel. You log on to Amazon.com and scan for the latest self help book... You’ve forgotten who you are as a child of God.” Paul Tripp, New Morning Mercies This was just the conversation I was having with my brother the other day, as I was asking his opinions on the influences I allow on my kids, and the methods I use to teach them. His comment was that there is no greater teacher of wisdom, critical thinking, persuasive speaking, etc., than the Bible, and Christ himself. If we take time to really look at the the gospels and what Christ is saying, we see he IS the greatest teacher. How true and freeing that was to be reminded of! Why did I start to forget the power and completeness of the gospel?! The Bible truly is the best source for teaching, and how wonderful it is that God has given us all such a blessing to have his word at our fingertips! So, the spirit of God should be working in every aspect of my life, including parenting. The gospel isn’t just something we hear at church. It changes us. How have I see the spirit working? What does this look like practically? Well, if you’re are a parent, then you know how time and time again you are put in situations where you are completely at loss on what to do. You see your limitations, your lack of wisdom, your inability to completely help and solve every problem your child throws at you. It is humbling, discouraging, frustrating, but is also where you can allow God to take control if you are willing to submit to him. We’ve been battling anger and tempers right now in our parenting journey. My kid definitely has my temper and gets mad to the point of being out of control. I get it 100%! That’s me. The problem is I don’t really know how to help. He’s sobbing in frustration and learning that throwing things, hitting others, or biting himself all aren’t ok ways of dealing with his feelings. When I was mad as a kid, I’d ride the fourwheeler or shoot some pine cones with the BB gun to take a break and calm down, but those aren’t good options for a toddler. We pray, but that honestly just irks him more, and again, wrong as it is, I get it! When I’m mad, I’m mad at God too. Don’t hug me, lecture me, belittle the issue, just give me space, and talk to me later, But how do you help a toddler who doesn’t even understand what he’s feeling and why? We were praying, disciplining, trying to give better solutions, modeling how to talk it out, but we were grasping at straws and felt like we were drowning. (That drowning feeling is usually a good hint that I’ve been trying to be in control of something instead of giving it to God.) Then, finally one day God revealed to me what was before right before my dumb eyes, Danny’s favorite Bible story, The Talking Donkey. Every morning we read the story about Baalam’s talking donkey. And what does angry Baalam do? Hit his nice donkey. Seriously, I feel like God must have been rolling his eyes at how dense I was for not seeing this as my kid requested it every morning. But finally, thanks to the Holy Spirit, I finally saw a way to connect scripture to the issue at hand. So now if he’s mad or hits, we talk about Baalam. Walk about how Baalam sinned. How Baalam could have acted in a better way. We even called Baalam on the play phone and talked about forgiveness, something that has been very challenging around here. It hasn’t completely solved the issues. Like any normal human being my kid still gets mad, makes mistakes, needs to calm down, but I’m now learning to try to connect the situation to a story in scripture and it greatly calms him down. As I work through those times I have peace, I’m no longer drowning, because I’m letting God teach me and him. Isn’t it funny how as a kid you think parenting is all about training kids, and then you realize it’s God training and teaching adults by using kids. My child listens better to a story about someone else struggling with the same thing over just lecturing on why his behavior isn’t ok. We talk about times I have struggled and needed to make a better choice and we talk about people in the Bible. The other issue we’ve been battling is him making noises at us when he’s mad. In not knowing how to properly handle correction, he’s been getting disciplined for making what we’ve been referring to as animal sounds. Again the Holy Spirit stepped in. Who acted like an animal in the Bible? King Nebuchadnezzar!!!! Here I already had experience telling this story to a bunch of toddlers thanks to BSF covering it just months before. Little did I realize God was training me in the story to be prepared to use it to teach my child. How good is He! Suddenly if found myself telling the story of someone who REALLY acted like an animal. I was careful to not stretch the story to fit my parenting needs, although it was scary how tempting it was. I just shared the truth of the story and the lesson in it. Even though it didn’t relate to what I wanted my kid to learn, I trusted that maybe God wanted to teach him something different than I did. God knows my child perfectly. He sees his heart. So I felt at peace talking about Nebbuccanezzar’s arrogance before God, his depraved mind, and what wisdom without God is really like, and let go of the perfect obedience lecture I wanted to give. Discipline is an opportunity to share the gospel with my child, to come together before God, and that is what God provided, so I had to let go of how I wanted the teaching moment to be and follow where God was taking us. The freeing feeling of peace after these issues helps me know God is working. I’m sure plenty of Christian parents would have frowned on the whole Nebuchadnezzar situation and how I handled it. The story did distract him from the issue. I didn’t reconnect it to the behavior by saying something like “God made Nebuchadnezzar an animal for not obeying.” I can’t change scripture to meet my needs. The lesson of Nebuchadnezzar was different so I just shared that lesson. But I trust God. He led me to the story. Somehow he is going to use it. Who am I to say I know exactly what the most important lesson is for my kid?! Bottom line is, I can’t change my child. Only God can. His wisdom is perfect. His word is perfect. He provides for us all we need, including our parenting needs. We’re still working through these issues. This post in no way it so say we solved toddler tantrums, but God truly does provide all we need in his word. His spirit provides all the wisdom we can ever need or get.
These days little Danny is full of questions. We skipped the "WHY" stage and he went straight to wanting to know about anything and everything. "Where's it come from?" "What's that (fill in toddler description) thing?" "Where's it?" "Where's our house go?" "What's that noise? My hear something." "What my mell?" (What do I smell?) We're answering hundreds of questions a day and car rides now don't have much room for conversation time between mom and dad. Danny wants to know about everything, and you better not give him a one word answer, or you're getting the same exact question thrown right back at you. I've learned the trick to not getting the same question, is giving him a long enough answer that just begins to hit the boring, too-much-information zone. Thank goodness he's learning to at least describe things now, and were past him expecting us to know exactly what he spotted while we were driving 70 mph on the highway. He's learning to describe by color, size and shape, which helps us out. If its a sound, he's getting pretty good at mimicing just about anything. Sometimes he doesn't like our answer and corrects us. Why he has to ask about something he already knows, I still haven't fiured out. Sometimes we just throw the question back at him, if we know he already knows the answer. And boy is this kid observant! I honestly can believe what he notices, connects, and even remember from months past. He notices everytime I'm hurting and hold on to the handle to get out of the car saying, "You got out like Nana." (Exactly what everyone wants to hear, that they're moving as well as their 80 year old grandma.) He notices sounds I completely tune out. Last night he asked, "Whats that noise?" When I incorrectly said it was the birds out the window, he said, "no" and made a low humming noise. Only then did I realize the dehumidifire hum running up the vents from the basement. "What my mell" is one of his top questions, especially in the car. From rain in the air to manure at the barn, he notices and asks about it all. For the first time I've noticed the sweet, faint smell of honeysuckle coming in the windows on the drive home along the river. How many times have I done that drive and never even noticed it. I am truly thankful what he is opening my eyes (and ears and nose) to. Every parent will tell you playing non-stop 20 questions makes you about ready to go to insane. Its the constant, "Where's my house go," and "Mommy point to my house," when we're nowhere close, that is exasperating. It is like he thinks if I point to where it is, it will magically appear and we will be home. When that starts we try to find anything out the window for redirecting for everyone's sake. Not liking my answer, or those times I have no idea what he's talking about, can be really frustrating for both of us. He's not the type to be fooled about me not knowing what he is asking, and I don't want to lie and just make up something to shut him up. I try to explain that I don't always know but it is a good question. Sometimes I suggest someone else he can ask, or we just talk about how God made things the way they are. The thing is, I love seeing how his mind works, how he wants to learn, and how observant he is, but it is a daily test on my patience. I'm trying to remind myself when he's asked me the same thing for the 100th time to be patient, talk kindly, apprecitiate his learning, and try to find the humor in it all. The thing is, the kid is freaking smart! I'm not saying he's any genius or even smarter than any other kid, but compared to me he's miles ahead. Kids have a fresh, energetic, inquisitive mind that we as adults tend to lose. They want to learn, to explore, to question. Everything is new and fascinating. They will make connections to things we never thought of and notice the tinest of details if we just keep out mouths closed and let them explore. They don't have the negative look on things. Life isn't boring. They don't know everything and are completely ok admitting it. He's teaching me again to notice the little world around me. I don't need to go anywhere to have an adventure or be entertained, I just need to reengage my mind again. For as exasperating at times it can be, I don't want to squelch his inquisitive mind. I don't want to teach him to live life with a brain on autopilot. I want him to share his interests, questions, ideas, and observations with me. I want him to know I really do care about what he thinks. But none of that will stay if I respond with a tone, or a quick answer. He'll eventually not share his mind with me, and maybe even worse, completely quit thinking. I don't want to have a teenager someday, who doesn't want to talk to me, because, as a toddler, I taught him I was too impatient and uninterested to care to listen.
Unfortunately I don't feel I do well at it. When I have responded wrongly, I apologize. I tell him it wasn't ok for me to be cross or short. I tell him I need to speak kindly and ask God to help me when I feel impatient. I also tell him how much I really love that he wants to learn and I want him to ask questions. I tell him how I love his stories and knowing what he is thinking. These days it is my prayer that I will be able to listen, engage, be patient, and value those questions in the moment because I really do love how his mind works. I love writing and something about poetry has always interested me. The lack of rules and the way it can share a story with such few words intrigues me. Sometimes when I can't sleep that's where my mind goes. I love reading A.A. Milne and Robert Lois Stevenson to baby because they both had the ability to capture the heart and mind of a child. I like to think that maybe they both wrote really for the benefit of the parents, helping dust the cobwebs off those childhood memories, softening out our calloused adult hearts to remember the joy and life of childhood. Secretly getting us to put ourselves in our child's shoes and look again through childish eyes to see the world as it was intended to be seen. Danny typically has been a good sleeper but just as we got back into a good rhythm, he's back in our bed thanks to the snow plows. I remember my childhood well, seemingly better than most people. I remember the terror of sleeping in my room alone. I remember honestly thinking that my friends parents who NEVER let them in their bed, must not love them as much. Thankfully I never told my friends that, but I remember feeling so sorry for them. I remember the fears and terror of being alone, and the immense comfort it brought getting to snuggle in my parents bed after a storm or nightmare. As a parent I understand wanting him in his own room, and with another baby coming in April, I don't want to build a habit. Then the memories of what it was like being so scared as a child toss me back to letting him in our room. That's currently where we are. Wading through the murky waters of the best solution, trying to balance empathy with firmness and discipline. Trying to discern when to fight him and when to be understanding. For some it is so easy to say "just throw him in his bed." "He's safe. He's fine. He'll get over it." Yes, that's all true, but for me it will never be easy. I don't disagree that it may be the course of action we need to take, but I also don't believe it being hard to do shows weakness. I sometimes wonder if some parents don't struggle with it because they've forgotten those fearful nights many years ago, where I have not. So while yes, to the adult, the snowplow is nothing to fear. We know it cannot come through the windows and eat our toes, but that is the understanding of a logical, seasoned, experienced adult. To a child everything has more life, more potential, more joy, yet, also at times, more fear. As I rocked baby last night as he clung to my neck crying, my mind was thinking of the irony of it all; a love by day and a fear by night. The poetic words began swirling around, reminding me what life it like in the mind of a child. I decide to share it as a reminder of childhood. Maybe another parent can read this and find that extra bit of patience they need, as they too, frustratingly wade the murky waters of firm discipline and gentle understanding.
As baby gets closer to the preschool age we are beginning to get the question about how, when, and where we plan to school. For us, homeschool has always been the plan, and with everyday we get closer to having to make the decision, we feel stronger and stronger about it. However, we want to do what we feel God is asking us to do with each child, so where God takes us is ultimately the deciding factor. As soon as we mention homeschool, a vast amount of opinions, suggestions, and questions come our way. There's more to homeschooling than just schooling at home, with various philosophies, methods, curriculums, etc. Gone are the days when parents think you're some backwoods, jean skirt wearing, unsocialized Jesus freak. People are starting to recognize the appeal of it, and most excitingly, research is beginning to show homeschooling has many advantages too. The people that I've run into that are the most closed minded are teachers, but it's hard for anyone to admit that there are people out there that DIY their profession. I'm sure contractors get plenty annoyed at all the home DIYers. To their credit, there are plenty of really bad home projects, but there are also some amazing DIYers out there too, who have just knocked it out of the park. Homeschool is basically DIY teaching. Just like there are plenty of good and bad certified teachers out there, there are plenty of good and bad, uncertified homeschool moms. You just have to know where you fit and it's okay to know if something isn't your thing. As I've begun having these conversations, observing others already homeschooling, and listening to them, I've quickly realized that if I don't want to be tossed around by the homeschool world, I need to get my priorities set. Homeschoolers love chatting with like kin about their passion, but that passion can quickly get you down a rabbit hole of people pushing their priorities on you. Originally, I planned to do what was already familiar and easy, sticking to things pretty much like school (I was a teacher for pete's sake, why reinvent the wheel?!) But, the more thought I put into why we’re taking this road and what we want schooling to look like, the more my thoughts began to shift on the matter. (Aren't I doing this to give him a different experience than typical school?) As I devote more time pondering the long-term lessons I want my kids to know, the deep rooted WHY behind what we’re doing, I find myself now swinging the complete opposite direction than what I originally expected. I’m learning I’m not fitting in with even the popular homeschool culture, at least not in my area, and I'm finding it may be the other homeschool moms out there that are going to give me the most grief, not the school teachers like I thought. But this challenge is driving me to research and educate myself more, to analyze my choices, my motives, and desires behind them, and not just make decisions on a whim. There are a lot of reasons to homeschool and I've had enough conversations to realize that if I can identify the root reason someone is homeschooling, I can almost guess how our conversation will go. It's funny too, how we can say one thing, yet our actions show something else. I'm always asking myself what am I prioritizing, because what I prioritize is truly what I value, despite what I may tell myself. It is so easy to convince yourself something is important, but when you look at what you prioritize, it exposes your root values. Church is one thing I'm always checking myself on. I say it's important to me, but when I use the excuse of sleeping in, avoiding germs, or spending time with family to skip service, then ultimately what my actions are showing is sleep, health, and family time is really more important than my time with God. Yet it is so easy in life to fool ourselves! We believe our own lies and ignore what our every day actions are showing. I find I'm constantly having to check my heart and motives over homeschool decisions as I ponder the route we want to go. It's easy to say one thing, but get sucked another way because my priorities are off. I see this in my conversations with others. Some people are honestly aware of their priorities in how they homeschool, and then others are completely blind, telling me all about what they value yet their decisions don't seem to align. No two people will agree on everything and that's not the point, it's the blindness that is dangerous and something I want to avoid. It's those moms that know their priorities, that honestly check their heart and motives to God's word in their decision making, that I want to learn under. As I wade through the various suggestions, advice, and beliefs of others I also have to keep checking myself and why I am agreeing or disagreeing. Why I am being pulled toward a curriculum or method, not just weighing the pro's and con's. Looking at my own heart's motives in my response reveals way more about the way we need to go than debating about developmental stages, age appropriateness, or college readiness. So then I keep asking myself: "What am I prioritizing?" "What honestly is the root driving everything?" "What do I want my real root reason for homeschooling to be?" So to give us a firm foundation to stand on as we wade through the many decisions over the next several years, I decided that Danny and I needed to take a hard look at why are we doing this. What do we want? What rabbit trails might we get sucked down? To do this we started with what homeschooling is not to us. I felt this was really important for us, because there is some truth in each one. However, these areas are where I feel a lot of the real pressure from other homeschoolers comes from, and where we can easily get distracted, prioritizing the wrong things. These things aren't wrong in themselves, but we don't want them to be the driving factors behind our decisions. We are not homeschooling to:
Then Danny and I looked into what we wanted out of homeschooling. Some of these things could possibly fit into areas above, which is why we did our NOT list first. Below are the benefits we hope to see. If something drastically interferes with these things we value, then it is a good clue maybe it isn't the best decision for our family. Top Reasons why we are Homeschooling:
Finally, we both came up with a mission statement for our little homeschool. Danny and I both wrote our own and compared, using both to create one for our family. It sounds so nerdy, but I need something solid to fall back on, to remind myself why we have made the decisions we have, and to guide further decisions down the road. Our Mission Statement To train our children with a Biblical foundation in every aspect and subject of their learning, creating independent, lifelong learners, bubbling with curiosity and creativity in God’s magnificent creation and appreciating God’s character in the world they live. To teach in a way that values every learner and their unique, God-given learning styles and interests, developing each child’s strengths and weaknesses to equip them in an eternally focused, God-honoring way that allows them to make sense of their world, grounded on the guidance and direction of the Bible and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This was so helpful for me to process through and helps me stay grounded. I've already had people surprised Danny doesn't know his letters, numbers, shapes, and counting. He's terrified to potty train and still has a pacifier. But he told me the other day which part of the sky the sun goes night night and which way is the right way to go home from the store, both I've never taught him. He can name all the different construction vehicles, tell you Paul wrote the book of Romans, remember where all his outerwear goes in the mudroom, and make connections between books and stories that I don't even think to make. The thing is, every mom could come up with a similar list of things for their kids, because kids are always learning. I can allow the pressures of society to make me feel inadequate, or just be grateful for the little person God has given me and enjoy the time watching him learn. I can't allow worldly pressure, my own insecurities, pride, laziness, or whatever else to distract me from our main goal. Both Danny and I gave top priority to providing a Christian and biblically infused education for our children. It is not just something that is Christian, but something that is gospel centered to it's very foundational core. We don't want the Bible to be an add on subject, but something woven throughout every aspect of their learning. That right there is what will be the root of our decisions and what will separate us from others. Plenty of people won't even understand the difference between a Christian education versus one that is biblically infused. Even other Christian homeschoolers may value a biblical education but may have a different top priority. Their decisions will be different, their motivations will be different, their priorities will be different, and I have to keep that in mind as I take advice. Ultimately, we need to do what is best for our family and where we believe God is leading us.
Halloween was always one of those things I was excited for as a kid. I loved dressing up in costumes, getting glow sticks, and carving pumpkins. We had a lot of friends growing up who didn't participate in it and everyone was always surprised my family did. My parents were known to be more conservative on a lot of issues, but we were the Christian family that did participate in Halloween. My parents felt there was a way we could have fun without welcoming all the death and creepiness in our home, and when do you ever have so many neighbors knocking on your door and out and about socializing. As kids we had conversations with friends about why we couldn't be certain things, giving us the opportunity to share our faith. We've taken the same approach with baby and he's following the same rules about how to celebrate. 1. No gross, death, or evil promoting costumes. It's pretty much open game on costumes as long as it doesn't fall in the above categories. This means no witches, demons, goblins, etc. in our home. My child is extra sensitive to the the creepy stuff, and I was the same way, so I definitely feel for him. Personally, I wish others would take into account the children that are more sensitive to scary things and save those outfits for times other than trick-or-treat. 2. You have to actually dress up for it to count. A soccer jersey over jeans doesn't make the cut. My mom always encouraged us to have fun and not allow insecurity to make our lives boring and I'm so thankful she did. You've got to know how to have fun in life and not be a drip about everything. There are plenty of ways to make cheap costumes that are still creative and fun. Most of the time, kids don't do anything because they're lazy and/or want to be cool. Let's face it, my kids are going to be homeschooled, so they better give up on being cool now and just learn to have fun. So as you can imagine, when baby refused to dress up this year I was bummed. Originally he said he wanted to be a moo moo cow like last year, but once he saw the udders it was all over. I was no way letting him get away with the OSU jersey over pants, no matter how easy it was so if he was participating this year he had to be something. Danny didn't quite get it, but I said if we start that now what is he going to do when he's 10. My brother was always particular about dressing up and every year managed to find something he liked, so I was willing to work with baby on his costume. I suggested a chicken, chipmunk, skunk, trash man, fisherman, horse, and several other things. After getting all rejections, finally in frustration I said, "Well what do you want to be?!," not expecting any suggestions. Well, Mr. Independent looked right at me and quickly responded, "Hay, fluffy hay." I didn't believe he'd do it but Danny said why not give it a try. He got a pampers box, painted it yellow, and used a rope and baling wire to hold some loose hay around the box, and attached his suspenders to it, costing a whole $4. Much to my surprise, that little stinker wore it proudly, especially when he discovered he got treats. At first he wasn't getting the concept because we kept saying candy, but once we called them treats he was all on board. (Amazing what a word swap and do!) He did trunk or treat until he got scared of the other costumes and wanted to go home. On Halloween he rode in the wagon while my dad pulled him right up to the door. He'd then hop out, put on his costume, say "Treats Please," and climb back in, telling my dad to "back up.". We made it to five houses and then turned around, but he got some Snickers and a tub of blue Playdoh so he was happy. Passing out candy at home made for some great sharing practice anyway. He still seemed to enjoy helping my dad make cappuccinos for everyone over getting candy, but I'm fine with that. Despite not getting another year of him as a cute animal, I love that he came up with his costume idea all on his own. And he was definitely the cutest hay bale I've ever seen.
Retrieved from chickensandchalkboards.com || posted May 16, 2015 But when the chief priests and the teachers of the law saw the wonderful things he did and the children shouting in the temple courts, “Hosanna to the Son of David,” they were indignant. Matthew 21:15-16 One thing I was so excited for about having kids in the house was having the excuse to be a kid again. Children and dogs seem to share the wonderful trait of always finding joy in everything. Kids have such a sense of wonder and curiosity over the simplest things, everything to them is new and exciting, ready to be explored. Their little minds exploding in curiosity and everyday discoveries. They help you learn to love things you once despised and to make things that had become dim now bursting in new life. The busy road outside our house, that I can sometimes so despise, is a favorite of Danny's. He loves watching all the traffic go by. We spend several evenings when he is tired just watching cars, and I find myself at times wanting a car to come because the road has been quiet for so long. Never would I have thought I would be wanting another a car to come down that road. You dont have to teach a baby to want to learn, discover, or imagine. Somewhere along the way we all allow the humdrum of life to overtake us, stilling our dreams, guffawing at our curiosities, and blending us all in like one another. We learn to complain about the dumbest things and quickly our kids pick it up too. Sometimes I welcome the rainy days. I love the pitter-patter sound the rain makes, but grey rainy days normally arent my thing and Im sick of them about this time of the year. Storms are different but that cold drizzle that most Ohioans seem to prefer to snow for whatever dumb reason just irks me. Like everything else, little Danny loves it. He quietly watches the rain patter against the car window and streak past. He loves to look out the window at it is splattering in the garden and grab at the droplets on the window as they slip and slide down. It reminds me of the A.A. Milne poem that my mom and grandma used to say to me as a kid. I've always been the type that when a friend tells me they've grown up, we tend to fall apart. Growing up means you sit around mulling over life with your friends and a glass of wine, and its just not me, at least not for another 20 years hopefully. Im the one that wants to still play tag with the kids on the playground and have stupid crazy dance parties. When we go for a drive I still notice the good trees to climb and the good sledding hills. Just the other day I was scouting out a good place for a swing and was contemplating adding climbing planks on the tree branches so little Danny can one day get to bigger heights, and he's not even crawling yet. Ive thought about figuring out a way to put a switch on the security light over the driveway so we can get the yard extra dark for Ghost in the Graveyard, and Danny and I have dreamed about glamping out the truck for the perfect meteor shower backyard campout. Baby chub is nowhere near needing any of those things yet, but he will get there. For now we spend the day finding baby appropriate discoveries. Last summer I was looking out at our yard, well speckled with golden dandelions and thinking how pretty it was. I remember thinking how wonderful it would be to have a kid tromping through all of them, giddy over the endless number of puffs there were to collect. As adults we hate dandelions, they over take your yard, can somehow manage to matrix the lawn mower, and suddenly stretch super tall with their ugly puffs, planting millions more with the next gust of wind. A kid however, can see their beauty, finding endless amounts of joy in them. I remember their was a lot at the end of my grandmas neighborhood that was overgrown with dandelions and I was jealous of how many there were. I always wanted to get down there when they were puffy and run and spin through the field, kicking up as many puffs as possible as they followed me along in the air. I would pick a bouquet of them to take home, but get so frustrated over how I could never manage to keep them perfect by them time we got back. Id give me mom yellow stamps by rubbing the flowers on her hand, and always wanted a crown out of them. Kids love to give bouquets of dandelions and so many times at school, kids would pluck one up for a teacher, yet too often as adults we look at that gift through adult eyes and forget exactly how precious that gift is in the eyes of the child. It was peak bloom of the dandelions the other day and little Danny was enraptured by them. At first he couldn't understand where the puffs would go when he scrunched them in his sweaty hand but then he learned to fluff them with his finger tips or wave the whole thing in the air. Eventually, all he wanted to do was eat them, which he didn't like, and I preferred not to have to dig them out of his mouth, so I would blow them in his face and he would try to catch them. Even Elmer enjoyed it, jumping and barking, trying to get them and stealing empty stems from Danny. By the end Danny was covered in fluff and I'm still picking it out of the stroller, even found some in the bed this morning, but he loved it and I was so happy to get to experience the joy of dandelions again. It was one of those wonderful afternoons where the sun was casting its warm evening glow across the yard. The chickens were clucking around and the hum of lawn mowers could be heard at every house. Baby Danny was just kicking back in a t-shirt and diaper and we enjoyed a simple dinner of grilled cheese on the deck. We watched the chickens eat up their last bugs and hop into the coop for the night as the tree frogs awoke and began singing in the woods behind. My wish for you little one is to never lose your sense of wonder. People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them.
Mark 10:13-16 |
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